Pregnant!?!

Well, I guess that Susan has made the official announcement: we are in fact pregnant and expecting our first child! This comes after five years of marriage and two different doctors diagnosing us as infertile (of course, they put us in the maddeningly unhelpful category of 'unexplained infertility'!)

We are referring to this, and rightfully so, as our miracle baby. There is no good medical reason why we became pregnant now, other than it is an answer to prayer and a gift from God. I can honestly say that I'd given up hope that we would get pregnant naturally. We had originally gone to the doctor because Susan wanted a definitive diagnosis as to whether or not she had endomitriosis. Of course, the doctor, being the top fertility doctor in the region, at the first consultation, was already alluding to In-Vitro Fertilization. We were naturally quite resistant – we only wanted a diagnosis, a reason for our infertility, from him. As we went on through the appointments, though, we agreed to at least hear the doctor out and see what options he had for us. He knew from the start that we didn't want any sort of medical intervention, but as time went on, I began to soften to maybe letting him do something. I began to mull over In-Utero Insemination (IUI) as acceptable. I still held firm to not wanting IVF, but simply cleaning and injecting my sperm in the right spot, well, I thought that sounded pretty reasonable. Thankfully, though, neither of those things were necessary.

Susan had her laproscopy on 1 December, and it came up negative for endomitirosis.  There were, however, so possible physical reasons to explain the infertility.  Some time later, on 13 January, we took a pregnancy test, because Susan was about 10 days late. Imagine our surprise when it turned up positive! We are very thankful to be in Jordan and able to be seen by the Middle East's premier baby doctor in Dr. Zaid Kilani. He has been most helpful and attentive, taking things very cautiously and closely monitoring Susan at every step of the way. The care that we have received here has exceeded my expectations for what would happen at this stage. We had wondered why we got stationed in Jordan – the most family friendly of assignments – when we neither had children nor were pregnant.  Now we know why!

We are currently at 17 weeks – it doesn't really even feel real. I've seen the ultrasounds from basically the beginning, since about week 5, so I've followed the progression from just a black spot with a white dot to our little one looking like an actual baby. I know that it's in there, but I've given very little thought to how our life is going to actually change come this September. It's scary to come home and see my wife researching highchairs, strollers, and diaper options. Especially with my personal transition to graduate school this fall, taking on two life changes at once seems pretty daunting. I know that Susan is going to be a great Mom to our kid, and I just hope that I'm able to match her for involvement and nurturing.